I'm a month away from being a Grand Mamma....I still don't have any idea what I want the baby to call me, but I think GRUMPY may be the word for Granny me. Have you heard the expression "Tea Cup Kids?" It's a name teachers have for today's generation that have grown up being told how smart, beautiful, talented etc they are. ALL THE TIME. Kids who win trophies because both teams get one, kids who play soccer games with no score, kids whose teachers can only select positive comments on report cards, when both kid and parent needs a firmer truth. It's a fine line between boosting a child's confidence and fixing his/her life to avoid all things that can cause distress, no matter how mild. I may have been a tough mum. If I didn't want my kid to touch a snappy dog, I would say "don't touch the dog, he'll bite your face" If they didn't behave in a restaurant, I didn't count to 10 (I hear parents counting 5 rounds of 10 these days) I gave them one chance to sort themselves out, or we left. I never had TIME OUT on a little chair in the corner with books and toys, I sent them upstairs to spend 15 minutes in their room. I didn't negotiate and discuss things when they were young. My parenting style was based on YES and NO. Maybe I scarred them or traumatized them with my old fashioned parenting....they seem ok.....they seem to love me and respect me still.....
Anyway, Grandparenting will be a whole new cup of tea and one I am really excited about. I am hosting a baby shower on Sunday for my Daughter in Law. I've nothing planned yet, although invites are sent out. We have no theme because we don't know the sex of bubbie. I hate shower games where you pass diapers around and guess which has the chocolate poop in it, or the ones where you sample baby food. Does anyone have any good ideas for shower games or little take home favors for my guests? I would love your input. So far, all I have is this ribbon bunting I made to decorate the room.
My all time favorite game was when the hostess filled little baby bottles with wine, capped with a nipple, and each person received one. Who ever emptyied theirs first was a prize winner. Talk about a hoot. Adult woman sucking on a baby bottle. We laughed to hard...it made for great pictures also. They were just the small bottles.
ReplyDeleteI hate games also. Especially stupid ones!
I mothered the way you did .. I had my first child when I was 18 and the second when I was 23. They could probably truthfully say They were raised by Wolves. Thank God, their father is brilliant and has amazing sense.
ReplyDeleteI just loved them and did whatever I thought was right. They both turned out okay so I give a lot of that credit to them for just being amazing and most of the rest to their dad and my good luck.
We didn't count to 10 either. One warning then watch out .. that was my way :)
I did spend a lot of time when they were small, playing with them, coloring, parks, picnics etc .. and it pleases me to no end to see them having turned out so well, with the same taste in some things .. love of ballet, music, art and they still love me !
Of course, their dad was brilliant and sometimes I think he really deserves all credit for anything working out so well :)
I am waiting for permission to say anything more :)
I grew up hearing "Are you bloody spastic?" and being chased up the stairs with my mom's hand swiping at my behind. I had 3 boys in 4 years so I had no time and no patience for time out. I spanked them and I read a book (can't remember who wrote it) where I learned the Spock Grip. It's where you grab your child's shoulder, slightly toward the neck, and squeeze. After about 2 times, all you have to do is place your hand on your child's shoulder and they behave...it worked and I was often complimented on how well behaved my little men were:) I've seen kids put in time out and it just looks like pure torture, so long winded and time consuming. I was a stay at home mom though and, like the commenter above, we had lots of fun times!
ReplyDeleteRemember the good old days when you only had to give out Valentine's cards and birthday invitations to people you chose? Now if you're not giving to the whole class, you're not allowed to give any out.
As for the baby shower, you need to hit Pinterest! I'm sure they have tons of idea's!
I have no ideas for the baby shower games . . . don't like them, don't like to play them!
ReplyDeleteHowever, filling baby bottles with wine and seeing who "downs" it first sounds like so much fun!
I just went back to look at who wrote that and if it is the Babs I know . . . she gets the prize.(If it isn't the Babs I know, SHE GETS THE PRIZE for best baby shower game ever! Take pictures please.
Grand Parenting is much different than parenting, although some of the same rules apply. I lived by NO, was NO, and it wasn't a negotiation. Fits of poor behavior while out to eat or in the grocery store were just simply not allowed. I think they might have "tried me" but only once. Sometimes I wonder if I was too stern, but sitting with friends for lunch today at a restaurant and listening to three toddlers screaming . . . I think stern is a good idea!
Love the bunting!!!
ReplyDeleteAsk the mom to be if she wants the games. Everyone I know hates them. I always thought if I ever held one I would offer onesies and burp cloths and simple supplies to decorate them for the baby. A way to spend an hour or two, good food, conversations, gifts and gone. As hostess you could pose childrearing issues and everyone can share how they handled it...or how their folks handle them...
ReplyDeleteThe bunting is beautiful.
My favorite grandparent names are oma and pappap
I had a friend who parented like she was on planet mars. I remember sitting at a McDonalds with her while her 5-6 yr old screamed at the top of his lungs while she sat there and we all sat there willing him to shut up. My friend just said he was letting out his emtotions, because he was disappointed with his Fish-fillet. Meanwhile, all the other kids had eaten, (all 6 of them) and had gone off to play in the balls. I wanted to run away. I was so mortified it glued my mouth shut. She just calmly said he would work it out. My GOD in Heaven, I wanted to heave that kid out of his chair, whip his pants down and give him a what for. Then I wanted to give her a what for, for holding the restaurant hostage to his wild tantrum because HE changed his mind. I will never forget it. EVER. Then, a few months later, she phoned me and was telling me about her 2nd daughter who was going to therapy to deal with her past lives that were affecting her apparent social slowness. Her daughter was 8. Thank goodness they had moved away. I never talked to her again.
ReplyDeletethis idea isn't a game but I still have the onesies from my baby shower for my daugther.....my aunt's purchased plain onesies and each guest used fabric paint and stencils and made my daugther onesies that she wore until she grew out of them.....they are now in her baby box and a treasured piece of her infancy..... just be sure and place cardboard behind the fabric the guests are painting on so it does not bleed through.....
ReplyDeletebtw...I was ousted as a room mother several years back because I didn't agree that every child should "win" during games for a holiday party..... I agree with you 100%...we arent teaching children resilency and learning how to be a good looser......or a good winner because everyone wins!!!!
No games Chania...I avoid all showers (just send the gift) in sheer dread of these stupid, embarrassing, games. Why can't we all just be together, have some nice eats and drinks, open presents and go home - just like real grownups!
ReplyDeleteThe banner is breathtaking. I've had 2 new grandkids in the past 1 1/2 years (with another coming!) so we've had showers. It does help to know the baby's name and gender, but I love that you are doing things the old-fashioned way.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE the wine baby bottle idea. I also think the paint-a-onsie idea is sweet but be prepared for people who will say "I can't draw a straight line with a ruler" and other party-pooper sayings LOL. One game (works at bridal showers too) is to go around the room, each person saying one word/phrase that has to do with babies (Labor. Diapers. Spit up. You get the idea). Repeats are not allowed, and if someone can't come up with a new word, they drop out. Winner is the last one with a new word.
Have fun! DeeDee
www.KidNeedsAKidney.blogspot.com
I'm not a big fan of the games, but I attended a baby shower where each guest wrote down the best advice THEY received when their children were babies. My contribution came from my mom: when the baby sleeps, you sleep.
ReplyDeletePeople thought we were rigid/strict parents, but we believe kids need boundaries, routine and rules. Nobody is perfect, but I think my children turned out to be very responsible, likeable, loving adults. Happy, Healthy, Self-sufficient was always the goal. When I see what's happened with some of their friends from childhood, I am grateful we set the limits we did.
One month until the baby is here! So exciting! Ann
I'm not a fan of shower games. Any shower I have is usually an afternoon tea and doesn't entail playing goofy games.
ReplyDeleteI like the idea of decorating onesies and such for the baby. Kind of like in days gone by when women would sit and quilt together. A nice bonding of women over the shared joy of a new baby on the way.
Hello Chania,
ReplyDeleteHave a wonderful time... what ever you decide to do, it must be so exciting for you and your whole family. The bunting is wonderful.
Ivan
Hi Chania......pretty bunting......I had a friend who played a shower game of guessing the exact day the baby would be born....each person guessed and the one who came closest or who guessed it exactly got some kind of prize. She also did a game about guessing what the mom chose to name the baby. This can only be done, of course, if your daughter has not already told friends what that is....these seemed to work for Mary's shower.....hopefully this gave you some ideas.
ReplyDeletexo
Jo BTW......many congrats.....g kids are so great!!!!!!
Hi Chania,
ReplyDeletemy kids have Nanna's - I think that's pretty Welsh/British really but I love it. I had a Nanna but my husband had a Grandma which I always thought sounded too posh and too formal.
I think my parenting skills are similar to yours - apparently I have the kind of voice that shows I mean business! I've been told many times I should be a teacher!! I say no and I mean it - I've always told them that if I say no it's for a reason and not to be mean (eg. somethings dangerous, too expensive...) I am constantly told by neighbours and parents of my kids friends that they are really lovely and polite. They are great kids - very rough and tumble and great mixers but neither would dream of cheeking anyone or breaking stuff. I never did time out either but never had too (with my voice!) - my sister does with her two who are much younger (6 and almost 4) and she often loses her patience and says "do you want me to phone Auntie Sam, she'll sort you out?!!". Her little girl has marched past us before telling us she was putting herself in the naughty corner because she'd kicked her brother just because she wanted to!! Not giving a hoot about being in the naughty corner just defeats the object really. My sister also has a friend who has the most horrible, naughtiest kids ever and they come into her house and break stuff deliberately and the mother just sits there and says "see, look what I have to put up with!!!!" - in this case I think it's the mother who needs a slap! I don't think there's anything wrong with having boundaries and being strict as we are simply bringing up great human beings who learn to love and respect other people.
Good luck with being a grandmother - apparently it's better than being a Mum, though I can't imagine anything better than that.
Sam x